


The last letter

by melodywrites (Northmelody)



Category: Hetalia: Axis Powers
Genre: Death, F/M, Letter, Loss, Love, Romance, Sad, Words
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-06-05
Updated: 2016-06-05
Packaged: 2018-07-12 13:19:04
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,523
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7106470
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Northmelody/pseuds/melodywrites
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>I got the idea at 3 in the morning and it made me very sad. This is my first attempt to write a Country x Reader and I hope I did not make any mistakes! Thank you for reading!</p>
    </blockquote>





	The last letter

**Author's Note:**

> I got the idea at 3 in the morning and it made me very sad. This is my first attempt to write a Country x Reader and I hope I did not make any mistakes! Thank you for reading!

26th April 2016

 

My dearest (____), Do you remember how we met? I do. I think about it whenever I have a quiet moment and can fully sink into the abyss of my memories without feeling almost anything despite of a certain numbness in my chest.

(____), you wore that beautiful blue dress your parents gave you for your 18th birthday and looked like a princess. But who am I kidding? You would’ve even looked like that wearing rags. The music, I remember it being Beethoven’s Waltz in E flat major, WoO 84, fitted the evening’s mood perfectly. There was amused and flustered chattering among Lord Edward Cedric’s female guests, mostly marriageable young women of wealthy families, while they were waiting for some of the cigar-smoking, moustached gentleman to finally ask them for a dance.

You were sitting there, (____). Quiet with an absent-minded and simultaneously dreamy expression on your face. Your eyes looked like they were thousands of years old, older than me even, and there was a certain aura of wisdom and kindness that surrounded you and made your presence in the room stand out between all the others. But not one of the men offered you a dance even when you were the last one sitting. I assume they were intimidated by you. Tsk. Cowards. Do you remember how we danced? Do you remember how we floated across the dance floor and couldn’t stop looking at each other? How we smiled and giggled like little children sharing secrets? I remember. I remember perfectly well and I will never forget this moment of happiness for this was the first time in centuries that I felt really alive.

Do you remember when we met some days later for afternoon tea? Your mother didn’t know of your visit, my existence wasn’t a secret at that time for society, and she truly feared you wouldn’t find a suitor if you’d start seeing me more often. Our dance at the ball had already brought up a heavy debate. You told me you didn’t care and I knew you didn’t. But society cared and I was a fool at that time even though one should have assumed, with all that years of living on my buckle, I wouldn’t be one anymore. You wanted to know everything about my long life, especially about my adventures as Captain of the St. Rose back in the 17th century. And whenever I began telling you more, your eyes lightened up and it nearly felt like you had always been at my side and those adventures were memories we shared together and not just stories from my lonely past. We spent many hours like this. Tea, some biscuits and talking. The more we met, the more angered your parents became, while we were the happiest persons alive.

Do you remember our first kiss? Oh, love, I will never forget it. You made the first move and me, being me, nervously mumbled some ridiculous nonsense but turned silent the second your lips touched mine. It felt like it was destined. You and me. This love couldn’t be just love and something inside me knew that you were the one person I had searched for all my life. I had butterflies in my stomach and it didn’t end with just those two kisses. Now we longingly fell into each other’s arms whenever we got to see each other. The second I opened my front door, you would wrap your arms around my neck as if we hadn’t met in decades. They called you naïve, talked behind your back and wondered how far this would go until you'd finally realize that one cannot stay together with a ghost of time. But what they couldn't see was that, in fact, I was the naïve one in this relationship while you were having everything under control. Everything was well. I wanted to spend the rest of eternity with no one but you. We could have our own adventures in the present and future.

_“How about we run away, Arthur? Steal a ship and just go somewhere where they can never follow! Like in your old pirate days. Sail across the seven seas with no worries. Our only companions freedom and love.”_

Oh, (____), all those promises and dreams. I hear your voice echoing in the back of my mind and can taste the salt of my own tears. Where are they now?   
  
But the more time we spend, the more of your live I took with me. Like in the Greek myth of Icarus, who wanted to touch the sun and lost his life in the process. I couldn’t do this to you. I couldn’t hold you and I knew it. You would either die someday or become insane. There were only these two options. Even though you tried to convince me you wouldn’t be affected if the laws of time changed for you and allowed you to age as slow as I did. I thought I knew better. I thought I did the right thing at that time. I wanted nothing more than the best for you  
  
 _“You don’t want the best for me, you only want to make the easier choice, Arthur.”_  
  
and that’s how I lost you.   
  
Remember when we saw each other again, many years from then? You had turned 30, were married and had two beautiful children. We talked about average things like the weather. You kept your walls up and I could understand why. You told me that you were working on your first novel. I still have it in my library, you know? It has a special place there.  
  
 _“On my wedding day, I wished for you to show up like the men in those books always do, take my hand and confess your love to me. But I hoped in vain."_  
  
I wanted to, believe me. But I assumed it was already too late and you never wanted to see me again. I know myself that this only sounds like a bad excuse…  
  
You looked at the bottom of my heart and I could see it in your expression. You knew that I still loved you and I think that was what hurt you most of all because, even after so many years, your feelings hadn’t changed towards me either.   
  
We did everything wrong. I should’ve done what you said. Steal a ship and just sail away with you. But I have duties. Orders. And that kept me from finding luck. Maybe I wasn’t meant for luck. At least not eternal one. Now we started waking up next to each other naked in bed and it was morally wrong but something so wrong never felt more right. Your husband wasn’t home too often and according to you he had many affairs of his own.   
  
_"If Richard can make love to whomever he wants, without any consequences, so can I."_  
  
And then came the day when he died on his way to China for business traits. The ship he was on had disappeared into the sea and from one second to the next you were a widow. Time moved so quickly.  
  
Your children left home after being married. Your parents died. You published your novel a few years later at the age of 44. It became quite a success and I couldn't stop reading it.   
  
(____), why was I so stupid? Do you remember how you looked at me, when you heard the news from the doctor after you went there because you didn't feel well lately? Life is cruel. I teached that to America once after he lost his first human friend. And yet you smiled so bravely. Accepting your fate. Where did you get this strength from? It happened far too often. Me standing in front of the graves of others. I couldn’t live with the thought that you weren’t walking on this earth any day longer. Your children didn’t know who I was, assuming that I was some cousin of theirs from oversea. A complete stranger. If I wouldn't be who I am, they could have been my children. I could’ve died with you. But then, who’d be writing this letter?   
  
100 years, love. 100 years without you. And I still feel the taste of your lips on mine. 100 years and I crave for nothing else than to see your beautiful smile again. Do you remember when you asked me if I enjoyed being a country? I still don’t know the answer to that question. I just am what I am. I can’t change that. The only thing that hurts being one is to lose people I love in the everygoing war against death. Do you remember how we once met? I do, love, and I’ll never forget it. Wherever I go, whatever time it may be and even if everyone has already forgotten your name, I will tell them of you. I will tell them of my soulmate and how I lost you. And how I will never forgive myself for it. This will be my last letter, my angel.  
  
Love always,  
  
Arthur Kirkland.


End file.
